How We Make DIRT In Indiana
All this time, you were led to believe only God could make dirt. As it turns out, Wahoo is so old, he went to school with God & remembers the recipe.
This is Wahoo. When he first started gardening, they used fresh dinosaur poop for fertilizer. This is Wahoo's first appearance on the web. Click on his picture to send him mail! |
Ingredients
First we start with last years dirt. Note the old plants, rocks, and weeds. These are added in proportions known only to Mike & Wahoo. |
We use only the finest ingredients imported especially for us from France. Notice the happy gardeners on the package! We too are happy gardeners!
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This of course is poop. Its squeezed fresh daily from Clydesdales (honest!) Thanks to Kripple-K-Klydes
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Mixing
Mix 3 parts dirt, 1 part poop, and a little lime for sweetness. |
Grind well.
CAUTION; Keep hands & feet away from moving parts. Watch for flying rocks!!
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Cook in an old pizza oven until dirt reaches 180 degrees. This kills old seeds, sterilizes the dirt, and purges last night's alcohol from the body. |
Add water, cover for 3 days and BAM!! You've got dirt! Eat your heart out Emeril! |